~becca~

 

Friday, November 06, 2009


some ppl leave for greener pastures.
but i think i am a green pasture.
and i think i am very green.
pastures don't leave.

i'm gonna stay.

you are a cow.
you are not a diary cow.
you are not a good looking cow.
but i like this cow. so for you, anytime.
you may come back to graze. =D


posted at 3:24 AM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Tuesday, November 03, 2009


i don't understand. why do people choose to leave?

when a person leaves under forced circumstances, by death or otherwise, the ones that get left behind blame themselves for not cherishing the person enough when they were around and regret not having treated the person well enough.

when a person leaves by choice, they usually tell themselves that it is for the better and the people who get left behind can only accept that as they are powerless to do anything about it. no matter how much they dun want the person to leave.

when someone leaves, there is almost certainly a degree of pain and sorrow to bear. to the leaver and the left behind. with no guarantee of a better future ahead, for who is to tell what lies ahead? who can promise me i'll be happier with someone else? so what makes it worth the move? since things must have been good once. why cant people try to find that happiness back again? it must be still lying along the way where we left it. why dont ppl jus go back to that point and pick up happiness again?

mistakes. everyone makes them at one point or another. sometimes it's small, like walking into the wrong toilet. sometimes it's big, like manslaughter. so who is to judge someone else? mistakes shouldnt become the reason. i'm not all that perfect myself, how can i demand perfection?

isnt life all about trying? trying to get the grade you want. trying to get the job you want. trying to please your parents the way they would be proud. trying to make yourself happy.being around people. that will lead to trying to make them happy. friends, lovers, neighbours. all we want is really to live simply and have no unhappiness among ourselves. all i want is to try to reach that goal as best as i can. to be at peace with everyone including ourselves. but how many people actually try? try hard enough? they take it for granted that people just get along with each other.

if you had a choice, would you choose your parents? if you had a choice, would you leave your parents? because your family is about the only thing you cant choose in your life, you never give up on them rite? as in, you're stuck with them no matter how bad things are so why not just try to make things work rite? different from friends and lovers. they give up on each other. why? because you can choose your friends and lover? does that mean giving up is a choice empowered by the fact that you had a choice in the first place? if you can try and put in effort for something that was enforced onto you and make things work, why dun you try and put in efforBoldt for things that you chose for yourself? people seem to be able to accept flaws and weaknesses in their friends more than they can for their partners. shouldnt it be the other way round? why does love become more demanding when the degree of closeness increases? why does love demand?

"两个相爱的人,如果有了相反的梦,分开以后能记得什么。是相遇时的惊心动魄,是相爱时的甜美时光,是争执时的锥心刺骨,还是分手时的最后祝福?"

i don't understand. why do people leave by choice?

of course, i have chosen to leave before. i have chosen to just leave things/people behind. i guess all i can say is, i don't wanna walk away anymore.

~now you know how badly you were wanted. people sometimes think of themselves as a burden rather than a wish granted. they forget. they look past. they ignore the fact that it wasnt easy having them in the first place.



posted at 1:39 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Monday, November 02, 2009


"men will generally do anything to keep their women happy"

really?


if it's worth it,
you won't give up.

if you give up,
you're not worthy.
-kopped from colin.


posted at 6:07 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Sunday, November 01, 2009


i'm spending this nite alone in my hall with a can of heineken! happy birthday to myself..sometimes i think growing up is really tough..and then i think abt all the ppl around me..and how much i've shown that i treasure them..then i tot abt this old post i had..i like to take it out once in a while..cos every once in a while, great advice/thoughts are often left so far at the back of your mind..


The importance of things can be measured by how much time we are willing to invest in them. The more time you give to something, the more you reveal its importance and value to you.

If you want to know a person's priorities, just look at how they use their time.Times is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it.

You can make more money, but you can't make more time.

When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you'll never get back.
Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time.

It is not enough to just say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing time in them.
Words alone are worthless.

Relationships take time and effort , and the best way to spell love is "T-I-M-E." The essence of love is not what we think or do or provide for others, but how much we give of ourselves.

Men in particular, often don't understand this.
Many have said to me," i don't understand my wife and kids. I provide everything they need. What more could they want?"
They want you! Your eyes, your ears, your time, your attention, your presence, your focus-your time. Nothing can take the place of that.

The most desired gift of love is not diamonds or roses or chocolate.
It is focused attention.
Love concentrates so intently on another that you forget yourself at that moment.
Attention says, "i value you enough to give you my most precious asset - my time."

Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love.
You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.

Love means giving up, yielding own preferences, comfort, goals, security, money, energy, or time for the benefit of someone else....


I'm sorry but have I neglected you recently? do let me know pls..and have you forgotten to spend some time with some ppl that you think mattered to you? do show them instead of jus telling..even when you're really busy and cant find any time to meet up to talk for long hours, sometimes a simple phone call can do so much..Italic

actually even just telling them takes time rite? but jus tell them sincerely i guess..this time round, i wish i had more time..


*appreciates jiaxing's call the aftnn she saw my fb status*



posted at 2:26 AM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Friday, October 30, 2009


i got the book..now reading "have a little faith"..hope to learn something from it..




解脱 是肯承认这是个错
我不应该还不放手
你有自由走 我有自由好好过
解脱 是懂擦干泪看以后
找个新方向往前走
这世界辽阔 我总会实现
一个梦


posted at 5:42 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink




The difference between joy and happiness.

Happiness, according to the Oxford English dictionary, is based on luck or good fortune. Joy on the other hand, is described as a vivid emotion of pleasure. Thus, happiness depends on circumstance; joy, on our emotional well-being.

At first glance, joy and happiness may seem similar but, really, they are quite different. We may be happy if we win the lottery, but we feel joy when we think about a beloved child or grandchild. Happiness may warm us, but it is joy that creates the fierce heat of emotion that takes our breath away.

We feel joy when we appreciate life-when we contemplate nature, when we recognize our freedom, and when we dwell on our successful relationships with other people; we feel joy when we have faith in something larger than ourselves.

Understanding the difference between joy and hap-piness is not about seeing one as better than the other, but rather about recognizing and celebrating the differences.

One way to understand the differences between joy and happiness is to think about their opposites. While the opposite of happiness is unhappiness, the opposite of joy is fear.

William Blake showed us the dichotomy between opposites. He wrote that two opposing emotions such as fear and joy expand and contract in direct relation to the presence of the other. We cannot feel total joy and total fear at the same time. This is why real joy is the absence of fear.Happiness happens when things go well. Joy on the other hand comes from a swell of emotion within us and sometimes has to be learned. Developing the ability to recognize and feel joy as opposed to continually feeling fear is a freeing experience. As we come to recognize that joy does not depend on more money, bigger cars, or longer holidays then we begin to recognize the strength of this emotion as part of our daily lives, as part of our psyche, and as part of who we are and how we view the world.

If you know joyful people, you will probably notice common traits among them. Joyful people are often healthy, both physically and mentally, they value strong positive relationships, and they don’t allow the extremes of life-sudden highs or sudden lows-to influence them unduly. Joyful people lead a more stable life. But these abilities do not just arrive; they have to be worked at.

Because we now recognize the connection between emotional health and physical health, teaching ourselves to be joyful may be one of the greatest things we can do to enhance our overall health. However, it is important to understand that joy is an emotion that arises from within us and is not affected by the things that happen to us. Instead of looking for external things to provide happiness in our lives, we must strive to find the joy within. We must educate ourselves about joy and work to enhance it in our lives. One way to start is to make a decision to wake up every morning and find joy in our lives. Think about a special person or a devoted pet. Think about the joy derived from a bird’s call or the joy of a day in a forest. It is our choice to be joyful or fearful. Let’s take the time to train ourselves to be joyful-our lives will be both happier and healthier for it.


taken from: http://www.alive.com/1611a4a2.php?subject_bread_cramb=91


found this off the web last wk..and i rmb telling someone abt it quite some time ago..i'm still joyful i have you..even when things aren't looking right sometimes and i'm not always happy..but every time i think of the things you've done that made me feel all warm and fuzzy everything becomes just fine..and i do fear what is abt to happen..



posted at 3:48 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Monday, October 26, 2009


i FINALLY finished my presentation slides.. =D wasnt that bad afterall..
and my back is feeling better today alr!

parents are flying off tonight..gonna be staying in sch for two wks straight again..yay! this time no one will be calling me to ask me to go home..hmm..actually sounds quite sad horh.. =( haha..it's okay la..they'll be back very soon!

monday (today) - fns up presentation / nap / go home / dinner with parents / see them off at the airport / back to pulau haNTU

tuesday - presentation at 12.30pm / celebrate and drink the rest of my day away!! hmm..or maybe jus a nap will do / bball if my back allows

wednesday - LECTURE AT 8.30 WHICH I AM SO ABSOLUTELY GOING TO (hopefully) / world lunch which i think i might not wanna go / STUDY / gl meeting / bday celebration

thursday - no sch! where shall i go? what shall i do? STUDY?? haha..

friday - shall i go dance?? ohh..my back.. =( meiying let's play mj..haha..

saturday - street challenge.. i jus found out ytd that my team consists of winston, joel who still owes me $3 for the change but it's okay cos i owe him $10 when i bought honey stars and milk the other time haha!, elvin, jiade, constance and mei ying..all the old ppl..haha.. / odac girls for dinner

sunday - THE DAY! yay! but i've got no plans..if my back doesnt break during st challenge i'll go for the great eastern run with the girls..then back to hall to do things i haven done for a long time!! maybe the tv..or maybe the swimming pool..hmm..


those in green are the hi-lights of the wk..wat an exciting wk..haizz..


on a sidenote, ytd zr bought me my favourite peanut butter M&Ms and yh bought jelly for me! happy happy =D


posted at 2:02 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Saturday, October 24, 2009


a mighty back rub and some stretching jus tortured the poor carcass of my already dead hip..it's now more sore and more painful!! =(

BUT

i loved the rub!!! (i wish i could insert my msn emoticon here..the one with the yellow round face..) heh..right now, back rubs are on the top of my "best things in the world" list..


posted at 11:19 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink




my back hurts.. =( i cant bend forward, nor sideways..this mrng still can bend backwards but now cant alr!! and staying in the same position makes it really sore..i want massage!! =(

--------------------added at 3.30am-----------------------------

i love surprises!! and i've been waiting for a surprise since 16/08/09 17:02..haha!! (if it's a surprise how do i know i'm gonna get it rite? heh..) but it's been so long that i dun think there's gonna be a surprise anymore.. =( oh wells..the way things are are the way things are..no point asking further or questioning too much sometimes rite?? hmmz..

oh! the new mitch albom book "have a little faith" is currently at the top of my list of to-buy-books..i saw it with mei ying jus now when we were shopping..but i dint buy cos they only had the hard cover which costs $34.90 with 20% discount..they had a soft cover one which is $17.90 with a 20% discount but it's in chinese..who reads chinese?? hahaha! kidding!

eh! super late alr..my back is feeling better now..i'm gonna attempt to lie down..no doubt it'll take me a few minutes to find a position that hurts less than the others..but it's better than stoning the whole nite! =D


posted at 12:08 AM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Thursday, October 22, 2009


hello! becca had a good day! happy! haha..

even though today is the first time i bleed while playing bball..
even though we all had to gobble down our hot soup dinner cos yuhuan was rushing for her class..
even though today i cant run cos my back injury is back.. [and it still hurts like mad now! i took so long to climb up the three floors back to hall after dinner.. =( ]
even though i know i'm gonna die for 204 presentation cos i have stage fright, have to do it alone, and will be in front of a class full of strangers..
even though i had a tummy upset afer breakfast at hall 2..(i think it's the milo there..i always get stomach upset after drinking milo there..)
even though i was forced to play the snake game for over an hour during world lunch with all the freshies..
even though i had alot of things to stress over today..

omg..maybe my day wasnt that good afterall.. =X

kidding! i'm happy la..had a good breakfast with GOOD company..and that basically made my day already..heh..then i had a good afternoon too! cos i gotta "roll around"..WAHAHA! <3


posted at 12:14 AM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


saw this on big big's webbie..haha..i wanna go there once it's ready!! but it looks expensive.. =( i wanna go to the hollywood section and sit in the theatre to watch the broadway musicals! i wanna go play!! ROAR!!


posted at 4:08 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink




oh dear..smoker turned violent.. =(

click
here!


posted at 12:37 AM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Joel says:
then ur blog liek so depressing sia


=xiao*mei= says:
haha..really meh?
but i always blog like that one ma

Joel says:
whah
then u need to change
too depressing
read liao also depressed

=xiao*mei= says:
wahahah
okay okay
i shall blog sth happy for you later k

Joel says:
steady

=xiao*mei= says:
hah
i dun have inspiration
hmmmm
lemme think k

Joel says:
blog abt me!!
i am always happy!

=xiao*mei= says:
hahah
but i got nth to blog abt you

Joel says:
fark
siannnn
why dun have?

=xiao*mei= says:
haha
jus dun lohh..
okay wat you wan me to say abt you?

Joel says:
NOOOooo

=xiao*mei= says:
wat is there to say abt you?

Joel says:
say i damn hamsum
and nice
and SEXY

=xiao*mei= says:
wahaha!

Joel says:
quick goooo blog



so here you are! =D
for my handsome, nice and sexy CGL's PA..


posted at 11:55 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink




read this somewhere..

Love is hard work, but it's the best thing you'll ever work for in your life.


posted at 2:19 PM by xiao_mei:: 0 witty replies :: permalink

 

-: Me:-


Sit here with me will you?
Sit and listen to the songs of the crickets.
Sit and see the dance of the stars.
Cos all I wanna do is to sit with you.



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